Diet Coke: the ultimate contraceptive?

Before I start, I'm not one of those Diet Coke warriors. I like the stuff. In fact I love it. I could easily drink 2 or 3 litres a day of 'black gold', as it's affectionately known in my house. And that's despite knowing it causes osteoporosis and toothrot and all that other horrible stuff.

Seems there's another thing "Doke" isn't very good for.

Sperm.

That's right, boffins have tested 'Coke douches' (popular in 1950s America, presumably replaced by the equally inconvenient but slightly less sticky rubber johnny).

The results, published in New Scientist and read over someone's shoulder on the Tube this very morning, are astonishing. Coke itself was not a great spermicide, killing only 41 per cent of sperm on contact.

Diet Coke, however, that waistline-friendly invention of body-conscious 1982, actually stopped in its tracks ALL of the sperm that was unfortunate enough to wiggle into that particular test tube.

Crikey.

Don't rush to try it though.

The scientists also said that once the sperm make it to the cervical canal (which takes only seconds), the Doke doesn't have much effect. Drat. You'd have to be pretty speedy to shake, aim and spritz in those few quick seconds.

If you do decide to go for it, look out for my next public service post, coming soon and entitled "Coat hanger abortions: the definitive guide".